Can't Take Direction and My Socks are Never Clean

If you're familiar with the artist Pink, then you know that is a lyric from one of her songs.  My socks on the contrary are always clean.  My IBS is getting worse but things with NB are much better now.  I'm just exhausted from being sick all the time.  I wish I could heal.  I wish I could make friends around here but I don't think that Maryland is willing to welcome me with open arms.  I just feel defeated. I can't find a job and none of this crap that I'm rambling about even seems to make any sense so I guess I'll shut up.  Bottom line, I miss Florida, I miss my old job and I miss my security.  I feel naked here.